The Flint Lock... whoa!
Steve!
Nerd!
Flint Lockwood!
Uh oh!
Good morning, Swallow Falls!
Behold, the greatest inventions ever invented
by me, Flint Lockwood, the inventor who is always
inventing inventions with the inventing in...
OK. All right. They get it.
Get the dishes of your wishes
with the Flint Lockwood Chainsaw-Washer!
Dumping. Slamming. Yanking. Yanking. Yanking!
Chainsaw-Washer!
I PREFER HAND WASHING!
Looks like I'm going to have to pull out the big one.
Presenting for your gasps and your, "Oooh, look at that" s.
The Flint Lockwood Honest-to-Goodness TIME MACHINE!
Whoa, I'm highly interested to see what this is.
Well, I guess I could make time for that.
The time is 8:45.
Booo, Flint Lockwood. Boo! That ain't nothing but a clock!
That's it?
Such a rip-off!
What? It tells the time.
What else do you expect from a time machine?
How about time travel!
Yeah!
Yeah, time, time travel.
That would be cool.
We don't have time for your shenaniganizing,
Flint Lockwood.
Wait, where's everyone going?
I can do that! Just let me make some calculations!
Um, anyone got a writing utensil?
How about a pen?
I was kind of hoping for something more pencil-y.
I had one behind my ear but it is gone.
A small gust of wind blew mine away.
We need stronger ears.
Here's a pencil.
♪
Whoo hoo! That is one unique idea, Tim Lockwood!
An honest-to-goodness Gum Pencil!
What the!
Awesome!
Genius! The gum holds the pencil in place!
Allow me to shake the hand of Swallow Falls'
finest inventor.
What?!
Uhm... I uh... just the-
Wait, you can't just smoosh two things together
and call it an invention. That's not how it works!
Lawn mower shoes!
Shower Chair!
Wet!
Chainsaw-washer!
I prefer handwashing!
Meatballs.
Pay attention, kid. Someday you might be a top-notch
inventor like your inventor father.
Tim! Tim! Tim!
You know... I... um...
Owie owie owie owie!
It's just... I worked really hard on those inventions.
It's like I was trying to tell you...
Mr. Tim, I am huge fan of your work. Would you sign my dog?
Uh, uh, uh, don't take it so hard, son.
Tim Lockwood, what is this wacky wizardry I'm seeing?
Shaking both shakers at the same time!
I always do one, then the other,
but by then my food gets cold!
This is positively... Indisputably...
Undeniably... A most astonishing invention!
Think of all the seasoning time I've been wasting!
♪ SPRINKLE, SPRINKLE, SPRINKLE! SPRINKLE, SPRINKLE, SPRINKLE! ♪
C'mon, everyone!
♪ SPRINKLE SPRINKLE SPRINKLE! SPRINKLE SPRINKLE SPRINKLE! ♪
This crazy town ignores every invention I ever make,
and then my dad pokes a wad of gum with a pencil
and suddenly he's Mr. Inventor? It's not fair.
So your dad's an inventor.
At least he's taking an interest in what you do now.
But I'm the inventor.
Well, now your dad has a few ideas, too.
Uh, kids, I hope I'm not interrupting.
Flint, do you have a sec? I need to talk to you.
Whoa, Mr. Lockwood, is that lemonade?
Yeah. All the glasses were dirty on account of the
dishwasher and the, uh, chainsaw
so I put it in muffin tins.
That's a pretty inventive idea of yours,
Mr. Lockwood.
Can I interview you for my Home Room Report
on the Great Minds of Swallow Falls?
You don't mind, do you?
Why would I mind?! Mind, me, mind?
Being ignored is the best. I love it!
Sam Sparks here. I'm with Tim Lockwood,
Swallow Falls' newest inventor.
I'm not an inventor.
Oh, come on, you're just so modest!
So Mr. Inventor-Man, can we see you invent something?
I, uh... I'm uh...
Wow-wow-wow-wow-wow! A head-scratcher for deep thinking
that doubles as a food eater. Brilliant!
I just thought of something!
I happen to know the Editor of Inventors Monthly.
Listen, kid, you're gonna be a star! You're gonna be huge!
You're gonna be all over the place! Your name in lights!
Your lights in names!
Why do I even bother?
Hold that pose, kid. I'm also the editor of Moper's Monthly.
Everyone's an inventor nowadays!
No.
Anyone can be an inventor.
How could my dad say that?!
I didn't say that.
Check out my invention. It's a rear-view mirror.
Warning! Objects in mirror are more awesome than they appear.
Uh oh!
Hot dog holder!
No...
Mouse log!
No!
Cheese glove!
No, this can't be happening...
Sam, are you seeing this?
Of course, I am! Thanks to my new invention.
This is so unfair!
It's a swirly background generator.
I always hoped this town would get excited
about inventions. It's just...
I was kinda hoping they'd be my inventions. Gum pencils.
It's so simple! Why couldn't I think of that?
I don't even know who I am anymore.
BEE! BEE!
You're right, Steve. I have to be a new person.
He always knows what to say.
So wise.
I'm just going to start all over. Re-invent myself.
I'll be a football star!
Maybe a famous concert pianist.
Dental hygienist?
Who am I kidding? I can't do anything.
That's because you were born to invent.
And you just need to show Swallow Falls
that you're the best darned inventor
that's ever been invented!
YEAH!
Calculating... inspiring...
moving my arms with the speed of science. Yogurt break!
Can you believe it? They're brother and sister?
I know, they're broth...
the actors are brother and sister too.
Second guessing configurations.
Aaaaaaaaaaaand
activate!
Good afternoon, Swallow Falls. Behold!
Um, Flint...
Not right now, Dad; I'm beholding.
The greatest invention I have ever invented.
One small leap through time, one time to stand them all!
The Flint LOCKWOOD TIME MACHINE!
That's still just a clock.
It's a clock.
I hate it. I don't like, it's not for me.
No really! This time it's an
honest-to-goodness-how-is-that-e ven-possible time machine!
Great. Failure. Again.
Flint, look!
These pencils have chewing gum on them.
Flint, don't you see? You invented the Gum Pencil!
I guess I did.
I invent so many things, I must have forgotten.
That's what I've been trying to tell you, son.
You gave me a box of these a few years ago for my birthday.
Since then, I've never lost a pencil.
And that's saying something.
You hear that Swallow Falls?! I'M AN INVENTOR! ME!
I'M AN INVENTOR!
Oh, come on! Where'd everyone go?
Hey, inventy. We've moved on!
Be proud of yourself, Flint.
You invented something that people really cared about...
for a whole day. Well, uh, not a whole day.
It was maybe an eight-hour period.
Well, at least from sun up... no, not even then.
Thanks, Dad. Sorry I was a bit of a jerk back there.
Aw, come on guys. Hug it out!
I'd rather not.
I'm good.
Come on! Don't be afraid...
I don't... I just...
Do you put them up here? The arms?
I don't know... there's so many... there's angles,
that I don't know how to navigate.
That's not meant to be touched.
OK, that's enough.
By the way, where did you send that time machine?
Huh. No idea.
Boo!
Ooooh!
Good morning, Cannery High!
Sam Sparks here with your daily dose of cheer.
GO SARDINERS! WHATCHA GONNA DO? EAT 'EM UP, EAT 'EM UP,
CHEW-CHEW-CHEW! SARDINERS!
Sardines?
I hate sardines.
Don't worry, Sam. It's not that bad.
Ugh, I just want to be the school's number one reporter.
What does liking gross fish have to do with that?
As the producer of Cannery Corner,
I've never been more embarrassed.
It looks like you don't like sardines.
I don't like sardines, Gil! They're disgusting.
Listen, Sparks.
Don't make me get Mayor Principal-Dad involved.
If you want to keep your job,
you better learn to like sardines.
Uh, you know student reporter
is a volunteer position, right?
Dad!
OK, OK! Let's do this thing; I can do this.
Oh, c'mon Sparks, made of the tough stuff, let's go.
Sam Sparks here. This year's Student Fashion Show
is all about ugh..Sardines!
Of course it is.
And here's Baby Brent,
sporting the latest spring headgear.
Yeah actually it's a sardine-brerro, bro!
Offers great UV protection,
and is a great source of protein.
Wanna taste?
No! I don't want that! Brent!
Come on. Take a little taste.
Stop that, get away.
Why does the camera always freeze on my face like that?
It's still not that bad.
Would Sam Sparks please come to the Principal's office?
Oh, you're in trouble!
OK, it's actually much worse.
Agh!
My son Gil says you don't like sardines.
It's true. She's a sardine-hater.
OK, let it go, Gil.
Little Lady, if you're going to be the face
of Home Room Report, you can't be making faces like this.
Or this. Or especially not like this.
But it's just... it's just that sardines are so...
...Incredible. I know. Apology accepted.
Now to prove you're up to the task,
I have a major cafeteria-related news story to break.
Get ready for... sardine-flavoured cheese!
And you, yes you, get to be the first one to eat it
LIVE ON TV.
Sam Sparks here.
Wanna know all about the hot new treat
to hit the cafeteria?
I sure do!
It's sardine- flavoured cheese.
Yummers.
Mmmm. It's like a live fish in your mouth,
swimming towards your taste buds.
Eat it. Do it. Eat it.
Fill your mouth with it.
EAT IT!
I can't do it.
You'll never do volunteer reporting in this school again
if you don't eat that fish-cheese.
She didn't!
This one's mine, people! I'll save you!
There you go li'l buddy. You're in a better place now.
Sam Sparks, you're fired!
What? But, but I... I can't believe it!
I have a big problem, Flint.
I know. You don't like cheese.
No, that's not it.
Oh. It's the colour, right? No!
The density? What?
The weight?
It is not the weight!
The fact that it has so many different applications?
It's not the cheese! It's the sardines.
They're squishy and smelly and they're GROSS!
I need your help.
TO THE LAB!
Um, Flint? It's that way.
I know.
Isolating flavour molecules... Restructuring taste coils...
Extended typing for dramatic effect.
Typey typey typey typey typey typey type type type type.
VOILA!
I call it The Flint Lockwood Flavour Transmogrifer
or the Fli-Lo-Fla-Tra for short.
What does it do?
What doesn't it do!? Well, a lot of things actually,
but what it does do is change the flavour of food.
For instance, everyone knows that squirrels
hate pickles, right?
Well, that goes without saying.
Exactly, common knowledge.
So I'll just set the Fli-Lo-Fla-Tra on the setting
of delicious, crunchy nuts...
And if it can fool a squirrel...
Then it can change stinky sardine-cheese to taste like,
say, oh, I don't know... bacon!
Bacon! Of course, it can. YES!
Bacon... remind me again; what's so good about bacon?
It's official; bacon is the most popular flavour
in the world. Why there's spray-on bacon, bacon shakes,
bacon glasses, bacon braces, bacon trousers, bacon socks
and bacon brassieres. Why not? Bacon's just that good.
Hmmm, I don't know...
♪ B-B-B-BACON!
Bacon it is.
The plan is set.
1. Spray this on the sardine cheese.
2. Do your report.
And 3. Get your job back.
I don't forsee there being any issues.
No, I don't think so.
Sam Sparks here.
If you're looking for a tasty treat
that's lots of fishy fun to eat,
then all you've got to do is say cheese.
Delicious!
Woo hoo, she's one of us now!
Dad! That Sparks girl is doing the homeroom report
even though she's FIRED.
Meh. As long as I get rid of all that discount cheese
before it goes rancid, I don't care.
Rehire the girl. And son...
Yes, Dad?
No one likes a tattle-tale. Get out.
SAM! That was the BEST REPORT EVER!
Thanks. I'm glad you liked it. Maybe now
I can fulfill my dream of spending countless hours
being an unpaid school reporter.
Awesome.
Wow, you smell amazing.
Love what you're doing to your face.
Wow!
Sam, I can't go in the girls' ro...
Oooh! Is that scented soap?
Flint, focus. Do you notice something?
Hm. No No, Flint! standy-toilets...
My feet aren't sticking to the floor.
Your Flo-So-Fling-Flang thing turned me into bacon!
How did this happen?
It appears that the Fli-Lo-Fla-Tra, by the way,
not only transmogrifies the taste but also the taster.
Who knew? Not me, clearly.
But, on the upside, you look pretty cool as a bacon.
So I think we can all applaud that.
I DON'T WANT TO BE A BACON!
So you want me to find the antidote?
YES, YES, I WANT YOU TO FIND THE ANTIDOTE!
Lookin' smoking, Sam!
Good work, Sam. Your reports are crispy
with just a sweet kiss of maple. Mmm.
I used to fall asleep in homeroom,
but now I can't keep my eyes off your reports.
Can I lick your hair?
No! Brent! Stop it! Please? Maybe just the bangs?
Sam Delicious, I mean Sparks, to the principal's office.
Oooooooh!
Let's see, if a nut-flavoured pickle turns a squirrel
into a nut, then to do the reverse...
The squirrel has to eat a pickle!
Of course. A classic scientific switcheroo.
Now all I've got to do is get Sam to eat a sardine!
Ah. Right.
I'm here with Principal Mayor Shelbourne,
who has an important message.
Message, right.
Can I get you to stand on this plate of eggs, please?
Mmmm! And could you sizzle for me?
Um, um... sizzle? Sizzle?
It's more of a.
BA-CON!
BA-CON! BA-CON! BA-CON!
Ow! Ow! Ah!
BA-CON! BA-CON! BA-CON!
LEAVE ME ALONE!
Hey, Sam.
What are you doing in here?
I have the antidote.
Oh, what to do. I mean, sure,
yes, I look like fatty cured meat, but on the upside,
my reports have never been more popular.
Ooh. OK, what's the antidote?
Not sardines. No way. Nope. I'd rather be a bacon.
BA-CON.
OK, Changed my mind. Antidote-time!
BA-CON... BA-CON... BA-CON...
So, how does it feel to be normal again?
Oh, you mean everyone back to ignoring me
because I hate sardines?
Well, at least no one's trying to eat me.
By the way, that antidote tasted a lot like pizza.
Well, I might have used a little pizza
as a buffering agent. You could tell from one taste?
Yeah, and, you know, there were a few other clues.
Right. You gonna finish that?
Ew.
PEPPER-PEPPERONI. PEPPERONI.
Captions by sassonique